There she blows

Today is quite windy & rainy. Miserable to be exact, and so dark out it feels like nightime. Nothing really happened on the bus today, i think everyone is too focused on the weather and what they have to face when they got off the bus.

So I get to my stop and as soon as i step off i almost get blown away. Luckily the building I am going to is just a few metres down the street & across the intersection. As i am walking away from the bus i hear this lady laughing and giggling. I look back and its a lady that was on my bus now trying to cross the street. However my jaw drops because a) she made the bus driver get off the bus to escort her across the street so she doesn't blow away? and b) she is making him do it in the middle of the street during rush hour, not even at an intersection. What was wrong with using the crosswalk just a few meters down the street like everyone else who got off the bus? It's a very busy street this time of day and sorry lady but judging by the size of you i don't think the wind will be blowing you down. Just strong winds, not hurricane force winds. To make things worse, when i get inside the building there she is coming down the hallway! So she made the driver help her jaywalk, then enters the building through a door that was further down the street requiring more walking! Why?! What was the purpose of that?! She really needs to get that Agyrophobia taken care of.

On the catwalk

Hmmm black pantyhose over red leggings. Now that's an interseting concept! Did those holes get there before or while you were attempting to pull them over your leggings? And you're knitting! Well thats good, hoepfully you are knitting yoruself a pair of pants considering it's -20 degrees outside!! I can't imagine your holey attire is providing much warmth. Slippers on your feet? Sure why not. I suppose they are warm, but warmer then a pair of boots? And not to be picky dear but your bright fluorescent pink lips just don't match the bright red slippers, leggings and hair!

Would it be rude to take a picture? A picture is worth a 1000 words!

Stinky Stink

Oh, god! Seriously someone just shit their pants! There is no way a bus should smell this bad! It's an accordian bus which means there is twice the space for the air to move around. It's really gross and I'm going to puke! There must be more than one culprit! Thank god I only have 5 more minutes till I am home.

So my phone just rang, the bus is packed with lots of people talking, and of course the moment i answer my phone and start talking everyone goes silent. ugh. At least i'm not one of the rude people who feel the need to yell their conversation out to the whole bus! Kind of like the girl sitting behind me. I don't know you and i really don't care that whatever your friend told you, you think is "total bullshit", and i don't think anyone else on the bus cares either! So please shutup and keep your conversation to yourself!

Remember, public transportation means you are in public. Get it? 

A Sunday Poem

I smell pee
My seat is wet
I am worried

It smells like Popcorn!

For anyone who takes the bus, you are well aware of the variety of odour’s on it. It’s a game I like to play called “Name that Smell”.

There’s the typical smells such as body odour, last night’s curry dish for supper, a babies dirty diaper (why would you bring a dirty baby on the bus) the smell of the alcoholic sitting next to you, farts, stale cigarette smoke, and the butted out cigarette smell coming from the guy who just got on the bus who couldn’t part with his half smoked cigarette so he’s saving it for later which is now festering in his pocket! Those are the normal bus smells, but then you have the unusual smells like pizza (is it stashed in someone’s bag?), gasoline (I really hope that’s not the bus leaking), sulphur from a lit match (yes people light matches on buses for the hell of it), paint (not to point fingers but I am going to say that might have something to do with the construction guy covered in paint), and today’s random scent POPCORN! Everyday it’s like a surprise to see what the bus will smell like. Also it depends on the bus route as to what the bus will smell like. For example, if the bus route runs through the lower income area, then you are guaranteed a cigarette & alcohol smell! If the bus runs downtown where all the offices are located then you are going to smell cologne coming because of all the business men on the bus.

So just some advice, if you are not feeling well and your stomach is already a little upset, choose wisely which bus you get on.

Dance Dance

So its been two days & nothing has happened on the bus. Nothing! Well there is James Brown sitting across from me, dancing in his seat like his life depends on it. Oh crap, he's staring at me! Can he hear the words i'm typing? Nope he found a young lady friend to talk to instead. So i have come to realize that as long as you have a set of headphones and a smart phone to occupy yourself with, you can pretty much make everyone on the bus disappear & invisible. The bus ride feels shorter & much less annoying. However it's also a lot less entertaining. Ok let's remove the heaphones & take a quick look around for entertainment.....about 6 other people using the same technique as me by playing with their phones, a few coworkers,hmm a guy at the front looks questionable....oh shit! James Brown just moved closer to me and looks like he wants to talk! And the headphones go back on. James Brown is now invisible.

Waiting is just as bad

So riding the bus can be quite the adventure. However waiting for the bus is just as exciting....or creepy.

Yesterday i stayed at work late which meant the bus wasn't running as often so I was stuck at the bus stop waiting for about 20 minutes. During that time there was another guy waiting for the bus. At first he seemed normal (clean, dressed well, not begging for change) but within minutes that changed. He started walking back & forth, pacing on the sidewalk. It wasn't a normal 'waiting for the bus' kind of pace, it was 'I am thinking evil thoughts in my head and going to snap' kind of pace. At one point my back was to the guy while i was talking to a friend. I turned around to see if my bus was coming down the street, and as I turned around the guy was right there behind me staring straight at me and as soon as i looked at him he turned and walked away from me. It sent shivers down my back and i instantly clutched the bag hanging from my shoulder. Sketchy? Yes! I even asked my friend if it seemed like the guy was planning on taking my bag and he agreed! The guy made it about 5 meters down the street and turned around and came back at me! Everytime he got within a foot of me he would turn around and walk away. He continued to do this until i moved into a doorway off the sidwalk. Just in time too, he beat up a snowbank shortly afterwards. Yes a snowbank!

What is a Bus Jacking?

I have been riding the bus for years, since 2000 to be exact. Over the years i have witnessed some wild & unbelievable things during my many journeys on the bus. Some things make me laugh, others make my jaw drop in disbelief! I have always shared my stories with friends and family and it is at the point that when i see them the first thing they ask is "got any bus stories?"

Over the years i have compiled quite the collection of stories and have finally decided it's time to share with the rest of the world my bus adventures. If you are already a fellow bus commuter such as myself then i am sure you will be able to relate. If you have never taken the bus then this will open your eyes up to what really happens on the bus!

Bus jacking is just my way of saying when you think no one is watching or paying attention to you......think again. I am watching and i have just jacked you!